Posts
i swear davis cameron has has botox..... defo wearing make up.
nick clegg is rather kool
gordon brown is rather funny
Part 2:
Nick Clegg is actually nauseating. Why? Well, he keeps saying we need a change from the old parties. He keeps trying to be emphathetic tooo much, and appears to be playing too much on emotions eurgh. He seems to discredit the other parties policies without really saying enough about his, he was doing this in the last debate.
Part 3:
Well, Mr Brown may be prone to gaffs (as was shown by calling a woman a bigot), but hey he has strong knowledge and experience of how to handle the economy, and right now, that's what we need, someone that can help our dire economy... go Gordon Brown! Also he doesn't talk with a lot of air
I'm starting to get the impression that Nick Clegg talks at you.. not kool. I love the way he keeps trying to act as if he is the peacemaker and still using the emotional card, and then when he can't answer a question, turns it back around on whoever asked it. And then keeps saying everyone has got it all wrong... EURGH!!!!
I've been finding the debates intriguing, and I like learning about what the parties have to offer me, but at the same time, I can't help but think, oh good, you say you'll be able to do all these things for me, but in reality, can they actually do them? Maybe on white paper, but just cos it works on paper doesn't mean it'll happen in the real world I've done enough physics questions to know that theory doesn't always mirror reality. Like stuff happens that we can't predict and our resources have to be diverted right?
Take the 9/11, I don't know whether or not it could of been stopped but either way, a lot of time, and money was diverted to what we now know to be wars and stuff... I doubt the running parties would of factored in wars to their manifestos.
I get the impression that of the three leaders, Brown is being the most sensible. Some people argue that we could of stopped the economic crisis we are in, or it could of been less severe. If you look at our economy, we rely heavily on imports, we export little, therefore anything that happens in other countries economies would of affected ours. This is what happens in a globalised world. I don't support socialism, but Russia because it is a closed economy suffers a lot less, just a note.
THis will be continued, but I got lectures to go to!
Thursday, 15 April 2010
Monday, 12 April 2010
Prisoners
For a while now, I've known that a friend of mine, Michael Perry, of Polunsky Unit, Texas, is to be executed by lethal injection on 1st July 2010. A number of people reading this, may even look him up, and say well he deserves it. I've read into his case and I've read a lot about the legal system in America, and I believe that his execution (Should it go ahead) is wrong.
I've a number of friends in prison, and a couple I've kept in contact with a couple when they got out. Ok granted, they both went back in, one a number of times too... But at the end of the day, I know these people and yeah they may have done some bad things, but I can easily say, some of the most genuine people you could ever meet are people on the inside. Why do I say this? They are all blunt and to the point, they know that sometimes I may feel upset by their words, but I know deep down they are being honest with me. These people are some of the most beautiful human beings I have ever met in my life. One of them, in all honesty, if it weren't for him, I doubt I'd be doing physics are uni right now. He really opened my eyes to physics and showed me soo much wonder.
They've done bad things, and they are the first to admit it, but because of that, they try so hard to better themselves, to be better people. They want to show the world they are not worthless, but are full of potential, and it's beautiful to see just how hard some try. I get the impression that if it weren't for prison they wouldn't be the humans they are now. Because their world closed in on them, they want to do all they can to create a better life for themselves. How many people make an effort to improve themself when they have everything to distract them? Lord knows how many times I've tried to do something but stopped because I had nothing pushing me.
These people may not have many friends on the outside, and so they will cling to any friendship that comes their way. Some of the loveliest things people have said about me are from people in prison. And no they aren't trying to butter me up either, because they'e also been preetty honeest about some of my lesser traits. They know that it's not worth lying to me, or doing anything untoorde, cos they'll lose out in the end. Sometimes I've been given advice that I really didn't want to hear, but they were just being honest, and the amount of times I've said, no your wrong.. and in the end turns out they are right. These people have gained soo much life experience from being in prison. I'm not saying all prisoners are lovely people, You do get a lot of rotten apples in there, and maybe I just lucked out..but I hate it when my friends say bad things against them, judging them purely on their crime. That's not the person.
My friends have made my some really lovely things which I keep in my room. One is rather good at art, and I always done this fancy writing on the front of envelopes and would make me really nice cards. Another did loads of drawings and granted some I found kinda creepy, but they were still really good. Another opened my onto a spritiual path where I found inner peace and a better way of dealing with things.
I've a number of friends in prison, and a couple I've kept in contact with a couple when they got out. Ok granted, they both went back in, one a number of times too... But at the end of the day, I know these people and yeah they may have done some bad things, but I can easily say, some of the most genuine people you could ever meet are people on the inside. Why do I say this? They are all blunt and to the point, they know that sometimes I may feel upset by their words, but I know deep down they are being honest with me. These people are some of the most beautiful human beings I have ever met in my life. One of them, in all honesty, if it weren't for him, I doubt I'd be doing physics are uni right now. He really opened my eyes to physics and showed me soo much wonder.
They've done bad things, and they are the first to admit it, but because of that, they try so hard to better themselves, to be better people. They want to show the world they are not worthless, but are full of potential, and it's beautiful to see just how hard some try. I get the impression that if it weren't for prison they wouldn't be the humans they are now. Because their world closed in on them, they want to do all they can to create a better life for themselves. How many people make an effort to improve themself when they have everything to distract them? Lord knows how many times I've tried to do something but stopped because I had nothing pushing me.
These people may not have many friends on the outside, and so they will cling to any friendship that comes their way. Some of the loveliest things people have said about me are from people in prison. And no they aren't trying to butter me up either, because they'e also been preetty honeest about some of my lesser traits. They know that it's not worth lying to me, or doing anything untoorde, cos they'll lose out in the end. Sometimes I've been given advice that I really didn't want to hear, but they were just being honest, and the amount of times I've said, no your wrong.. and in the end turns out they are right. These people have gained soo much life experience from being in prison. I'm not saying all prisoners are lovely people, You do get a lot of rotten apples in there, and maybe I just lucked out..but I hate it when my friends say bad things against them, judging them purely on their crime. That's not the person.
My friends have made my some really lovely things which I keep in my room. One is rather good at art, and I always done this fancy writing on the front of envelopes and would make me really nice cards. Another did loads of drawings and granted some I found kinda creepy, but they were still really good. Another opened my onto a spritiual path where I found inner peace and a better way of dealing with things.
Friday, 9 April 2010
musings
Ok, so lets say you hurt someone really badly but in your opinon you didn't cause it, yet everyone else seems to think you have. Why do you feel that it isn't your fault? I was thinking about this, and the best answer I could come up with is responsibility. Unless you take responsibilty for something, you won't feel like you have done anything wrong. Which then begs the question, Do we have to take responsibility for something? Like if you fuck around with someone mentally/emotionally, do you have to take responsibilty for what you did or can you legitimately not give a fuck?
Saturday, 3 April 2010
Takes the piss part 2
...According to Matt I make a particular face when I am pissed off...
Anyways, lets see
March 19th: Leeds to London, then London to Glasgow
March 23rd: Glasgow to Leeds
March 25th: Leeds to Glasgow
March 30th: Glasgow to Leeds, Then Leeds to Glasgow (except this time, Stuck outside Darlington for 30mins stuck outside Newcastle for an hour, Stuck at Newcastle for another hour, Stuck outside Berwick for 2 hours, stuck at Berwick for 1.5 hours, Taken back to Newcastle, then put in a taxi to Glasgow which took 4 hours, all in all, took just under 13 hours to go from Leeds to Glasgow). In total 17.5 hours on trains in the space of 24 hours
April 2nd: Glasgow to London, only got delayed this time by an hour
PS: Numerous plants died due to all their transportation all over the country...
Anyways, lets see
March 19th: Leeds to London, then London to Glasgow
March 23rd: Glasgow to Leeds
March 25th: Leeds to Glasgow
March 30th: Glasgow to Leeds, Then Leeds to Glasgow (except this time, Stuck outside Darlington for 30mins stuck outside Newcastle for an hour, Stuck at Newcastle for another hour, Stuck outside Berwick for 2 hours, stuck at Berwick for 1.5 hours, Taken back to Newcastle, then put in a taxi to Glasgow which took 4 hours, all in all, took just under 13 hours to go from Leeds to Glasgow). In total 17.5 hours on trains in the space of 24 hours
April 2nd: Glasgow to London, only got delayed this time by an hour
PS: Numerous plants died due to all their transportation all over the country...
Sunday, 21 February 2010
Death
For a long time I thought that my attitude towards violence and death was blazae. Why? Well, it's not secret that I know some people who have done bad things, snuffed out lives, hurt others, been killed etc. I really thought I was immune to it all. The way I would talk about a number of my friends, it was as if, what they have done was nothing serious.
Violence, and killing I viewed as an everyday thing. Every time a friend held a letter that had been written by a friend who had killed someone, they would always say, I'm holding something that someone has touched and with their own hands wrote, the same hands that killed someone. My attitude would be, yeah so what...
Today, I saw a guy who had tried to kill himself. His body landed directly opposite me. It wasn't the prettiest of sites, and I am glad it was dark. The guy didn't die, and he was in a bad way, and I dunno, something happened within me. I was staring at this guy, and I was sooo concerned, there was nothing I could do and all I could do was stare. I felt so helpless, and all my thoughts were for his safety. I prayed for him. I prayed that he would be ok, not maybe physically, but I prayed that he would in a while, find help he needs and be in a good place mentally and emotionally.
Before people came to his aide, I was just staring at his body on the tracks thinking, how easy it is to snuff out a life. The guy wasn't dead, but I just thought all humans are miracles, I am soo in awe when I hear just how complex and fascinating the human body is, and how each life is precious and sacred and how wonderful each person is. I was thinking how could someone want to do that to themselves. I'm not saying they were being selfish or anything, but I just can't begin to understand what someone must be going through to want to do that to themselves.
Of all the emotions I could of felt, I felt vulnerable. I realised within myself, this hard exterior I'd built to protect myself from violence wasn't actually real. A guy I know is on death row, and I said to myself, one day this guy won't be here, so I shall not allow myself to get caught up and to allow myself to grieve when he does go. I felt open and vulnerable, I'd seen someone try to kill themself, it was real. I couldn't ignore just how powerful death could be, and I wanted to cry.
I also felt vulnerable because I realised just how fragile life is.. how fragile my life is, and at the end of the day, death isn't a mental or emotional thing, it's a physical thing. Death doesn't care how clever you are, or how witty you are, or how good a player you are. No, death is just about permanently stopping everything physical.
Thinking about it now, I've no idea whether that guy died later or not, afterall he would of lost a lot of blood. If he did, I'd feel bad. I was staring at these people helping him, thinking for the love of god, put something on him, he'll go into shock otherwise (it had been snowing and was realllly cold), and they weren't doing anything to stem the blood. I just remained on the train...
When you're young, you think oh look, I'm invincible, I won't die for years and years and years, I don't need to think about death. I dunno, just seeing it, someone wanting it that badly, and trying it... welll...
Violence, and killing I viewed as an everyday thing. Every time a friend held a letter that had been written by a friend who had killed someone, they would always say, I'm holding something that someone has touched and with their own hands wrote, the same hands that killed someone. My attitude would be, yeah so what...
Today, I saw a guy who had tried to kill himself. His body landed directly opposite me. It wasn't the prettiest of sites, and I am glad it was dark. The guy didn't die, and he was in a bad way, and I dunno, something happened within me. I was staring at this guy, and I was sooo concerned, there was nothing I could do and all I could do was stare. I felt so helpless, and all my thoughts were for his safety. I prayed for him. I prayed that he would be ok, not maybe physically, but I prayed that he would in a while, find help he needs and be in a good place mentally and emotionally.
Before people came to his aide, I was just staring at his body on the tracks thinking, how easy it is to snuff out a life. The guy wasn't dead, but I just thought all humans are miracles, I am soo in awe when I hear just how complex and fascinating the human body is, and how each life is precious and sacred and how wonderful each person is. I was thinking how could someone want to do that to themselves. I'm not saying they were being selfish or anything, but I just can't begin to understand what someone must be going through to want to do that to themselves.
Of all the emotions I could of felt, I felt vulnerable. I realised within myself, this hard exterior I'd built to protect myself from violence wasn't actually real. A guy I know is on death row, and I said to myself, one day this guy won't be here, so I shall not allow myself to get caught up and to allow myself to grieve when he does go. I felt open and vulnerable, I'd seen someone try to kill themself, it was real. I couldn't ignore just how powerful death could be, and I wanted to cry.
I also felt vulnerable because I realised just how fragile life is.. how fragile my life is, and at the end of the day, death isn't a mental or emotional thing, it's a physical thing. Death doesn't care how clever you are, or how witty you are, or how good a player you are. No, death is just about permanently stopping everything physical.
Thinking about it now, I've no idea whether that guy died later or not, afterall he would of lost a lot of blood. If he did, I'd feel bad. I was staring at these people helping him, thinking for the love of god, put something on him, he'll go into shock otherwise (it had been snowing and was realllly cold), and they weren't doing anything to stem the blood. I just remained on the train...
When you're young, you think oh look, I'm invincible, I won't die for years and years and years, I don't need to think about death. I dunno, just seeing it, someone wanting it that badly, and trying it... welll...
Sunday, 3 January 2010
Dear Diana,
I remember when we first got you as a kitten. I was horrified that my mother kept swinging your cage as we took you home. Clearly mother was walking as she usually did forgetting the delicate creature she was holding. You were very scared. So scared that you hid behind the piano for a few days, finally venturing out when you realised that the piano probably didn't taste that great. I finally got to meet you. Father didn't think we had a kitten as he couldn't see you. Now he gets to see you all the time.
Choosing you over your sister was very hard. In the pet shop, you and your sister were both sitting next to each other on a ledge by the cashdesk. I didn't know how to pick, I ended up picking the one looking most sad. I think in the end that was the best decision I made.
You once annoyed everyone in the house. You peed on my coat didn't you. You were only a kitten and you were still very new and small, and had yet to be trained. Now you know better don't you! Mother was very angry, and I don't think I ever wore that coat again. Never mind eh!
You were so cute and everyone remarked on how beautiful you were. You loved attention, always rubbing up against someone's leg! You still do... and you know who will always give you attention!
You were always so affectionate and welcoming. Whenever we came home, you would all of a sudden appear and walk the last few paces to the front door with us, stick your tail up at us to say hello, greet us and then scamper back off to wherever you were playing. Before the new house there was no cat flap, so you would position yourself at the window nearest the door and wait patiently, only meowing to be let in when it was raining...and who can blame ya!
Ha, you loved playing with belts. I use to take one of father's belts hanging up and shake it around so it looked all snake like, and you would try and grab it between your paws... I found it to be soo cute when you stood on your hind legs reaching up. Watching you play was always a joy. You loved to roll around on your back, exposing your stomach...but dare anyone come near... a few scratches remind me of that! When you got into your hunting pose, I knew that a mouse somewhere should start saying it's prayers. Luckily for me, I've never had to see one of the many corpse's you brought back. However, your hunting skills did come into play when we had a mouse in the house. Being you, you teased the poor mouse, catching it, letting it go, then catching it, and then killing it. You also liked to go back to your instincts everytime we slying slipped you some meat from the table. You'd drag it out of your bowl and take it to a far corner of the room and eat it. We always use to find trails....
I remember when you got really ill in July 2008. I'd been away for a few days and I came back to find you limping across the kitchen. One paw raised and you in clear agony. I got very angry and demanded to know why you hadn't been taken to the vets sooner. I got some crummy response, but you got taken the next day. Man how I wanted to cry when I saw that pitiful sight. You'd been stabbed in the foot, and it had got all infected. When they brought you back from the vets you were all woozy and shaky with a buster collar. You really didn't like that, and kept licking the see-through collar thinking it was your skin. I can't imagine your tongue liked that! As I'd be away over the coming days the parents put you in my room. Now I know I don't have a bed anymore, but when I did it was over a metre high. Given that you couldn't walk cos your foot had all been bandaged up, and your little tray was on the floor, you peed all over my bed and it wasn't noticed until I got back and climbed into my bed. Thanks to you, I had a sleeping bag for 6 months, when mother finally caved and got me a new duvet. I didn't mind too much... I was glad you were better...
Seeing you now is agony. I can see you are in soo much pain, as your organs slowly go into failiure. But as ever, you are patient and kind and considerate of others and so sleep continuously without complaining. I can't imagine or understand what it must be like for you, to not want to go out to play, or eat, or drink, or do anything. I guess sleep is the only thing which gives you comfort. I feel foolish for not demanding the parents take you to the vets sooner as I thought it might of been this for a while. I should of protested more at the parents only ever giving you dry food. I guess your change in behaviour should of alerted me to it. You hate leaving the kitchen, you have your spot and dare anyone take it. But then you didn't want to be in the kitchen and would go all over the house, going through all the rooms and all the nooks and cranny's. I figured, your trying to do something, I don't know what, but I'll try and convince the parents to let you wander if you want, even though they hated the fact your shedding ridiculous amounts of fur. I suppose the tufts that are continously falling out and have been for months should of told us something was wrong. I tried looking stuff up and apparently cats when they are going to die, look for somewhere quiet, so I figured that was what you were doing and if that's what you wanted, then you were going to have it.... But now you are too ill to even do that. I know I can't make you comfortable and healthy but I pray that they can fix you. You've been around too long to go and I love you too much to let you go.
You are such a beautiful cat Diana, and you show everyone affection, even Bruce although he contstantly teases you and tries to force you out of the house. For 13 years, you are still the size of a kitten, and if any cat dared hurt you, I would get very angry at them! Probably the reason why none of them sit on our shed anymore! It's your shed. I do remember you once found your way in there, and mother was surprised to see you sitting at the window as you couldn't get out. Silly thing! You always had a habit of going to random places every now and then. Sometimes I'd open my door, step out, and there you were curled up into a ball on the floor. You only ever seemed to leave the kitchen willingly once a month!...
I remember when we first got you as a kitten. I was horrified that my mother kept swinging your cage as we took you home. Clearly mother was walking as she usually did forgetting the delicate creature she was holding. You were very scared. So scared that you hid behind the piano for a few days, finally venturing out when you realised that the piano probably didn't taste that great. I finally got to meet you. Father didn't think we had a kitten as he couldn't see you. Now he gets to see you all the time.
Choosing you over your sister was very hard. In the pet shop, you and your sister were both sitting next to each other on a ledge by the cashdesk. I didn't know how to pick, I ended up picking the one looking most sad. I think in the end that was the best decision I made.
You once annoyed everyone in the house. You peed on my coat didn't you. You were only a kitten and you were still very new and small, and had yet to be trained. Now you know better don't you! Mother was very angry, and I don't think I ever wore that coat again. Never mind eh!
You were so cute and everyone remarked on how beautiful you were. You loved attention, always rubbing up against someone's leg! You still do... and you know who will always give you attention!
You were always so affectionate and welcoming. Whenever we came home, you would all of a sudden appear and walk the last few paces to the front door with us, stick your tail up at us to say hello, greet us and then scamper back off to wherever you were playing. Before the new house there was no cat flap, so you would position yourself at the window nearest the door and wait patiently, only meowing to be let in when it was raining...and who can blame ya!
Ha, you loved playing with belts. I use to take one of father's belts hanging up and shake it around so it looked all snake like, and you would try and grab it between your paws... I found it to be soo cute when you stood on your hind legs reaching up. Watching you play was always a joy. You loved to roll around on your back, exposing your stomach...but dare anyone come near... a few scratches remind me of that! When you got into your hunting pose, I knew that a mouse somewhere should start saying it's prayers. Luckily for me, I've never had to see one of the many corpse's you brought back. However, your hunting skills did come into play when we had a mouse in the house. Being you, you teased the poor mouse, catching it, letting it go, then catching it, and then killing it. You also liked to go back to your instincts everytime we slying slipped you some meat from the table. You'd drag it out of your bowl and take it to a far corner of the room and eat it. We always use to find trails....
I remember when you got really ill in July 2008. I'd been away for a few days and I came back to find you limping across the kitchen. One paw raised and you in clear agony. I got very angry and demanded to know why you hadn't been taken to the vets sooner. I got some crummy response, but you got taken the next day. Man how I wanted to cry when I saw that pitiful sight. You'd been stabbed in the foot, and it had got all infected. When they brought you back from the vets you were all woozy and shaky with a buster collar. You really didn't like that, and kept licking the see-through collar thinking it was your skin. I can't imagine your tongue liked that! As I'd be away over the coming days the parents put you in my room. Now I know I don't have a bed anymore, but when I did it was over a metre high. Given that you couldn't walk cos your foot had all been bandaged up, and your little tray was on the floor, you peed all over my bed and it wasn't noticed until I got back and climbed into my bed. Thanks to you, I had a sleeping bag for 6 months, when mother finally caved and got me a new duvet. I didn't mind too much... I was glad you were better...
Seeing you now is agony. I can see you are in soo much pain, as your organs slowly go into failiure. But as ever, you are patient and kind and considerate of others and so sleep continuously without complaining. I can't imagine or understand what it must be like for you, to not want to go out to play, or eat, or drink, or do anything. I guess sleep is the only thing which gives you comfort. I feel foolish for not demanding the parents take you to the vets sooner as I thought it might of been this for a while. I should of protested more at the parents only ever giving you dry food. I guess your change in behaviour should of alerted me to it. You hate leaving the kitchen, you have your spot and dare anyone take it. But then you didn't want to be in the kitchen and would go all over the house, going through all the rooms and all the nooks and cranny's. I figured, your trying to do something, I don't know what, but I'll try and convince the parents to let you wander if you want, even though they hated the fact your shedding ridiculous amounts of fur. I suppose the tufts that are continously falling out and have been for months should of told us something was wrong. I tried looking stuff up and apparently cats when they are going to die, look for somewhere quiet, so I figured that was what you were doing and if that's what you wanted, then you were going to have it.... But now you are too ill to even do that. I know I can't make you comfortable and healthy but I pray that they can fix you. You've been around too long to go and I love you too much to let you go.
You are such a beautiful cat Diana, and you show everyone affection, even Bruce although he contstantly teases you and tries to force you out of the house. For 13 years, you are still the size of a kitten, and if any cat dared hurt you, I would get very angry at them! Probably the reason why none of them sit on our shed anymore! It's your shed. I do remember you once found your way in there, and mother was surprised to see you sitting at the window as you couldn't get out. Silly thing! You always had a habit of going to random places every now and then. Sometimes I'd open my door, step out, and there you were curled up into a ball on the floor. You only ever seemed to leave the kitchen willingly once a month!...
Sunday, 1 November 2009
What is life?
Everyone asks themselves this question at some point, and I'm not about to write about my thoughts on what life is... I don't know...
When I was young, I heard all the fairytale stories about what we would do with our time on this planet. Grow up, get married, find your soulmate, settle down, and as the story goes... live happily ever after... But the plot is very differant in reality. But is that life?
I've recently been watching the Saw films. I find them really good, and I am most intrigued by the mind of John Cramer. He believes people need to be re-born to appreciate life.. He's asking them to appreciate the motions that they go through..but is that life? If it isn't, what is it? to him, if your only hearing then not really listening, then you aren't living, if your looking but not really seeing you aren't living. It's all just motions..but isn't that what life is physically? Going through motions? Because appreciation is an emotion, therefore life is merely an emotion.
People always seem to be reaching or striving for life, trying to get at it... as if to them, what they are experiencing now, isn't life. To me, trying to reach at something, is merely a dilusion if your reaching for life. If anything, it's trying to get reach an ideal, and idea about what would make them happy. If they have this, then this is life, and therefore it must result in happiness... So what if someone does reach what their ideal was? Do they have life then? If so, then life is merely about living out a fantasy. What if they aren't happy with their ideal once it's reached? By their own premise they are at life.. therefore they SHOULD be happy.. So do they live a lie? Claim they are happy, and realise that this isn't actually life? If so, what is life then? Confusing...
Some people spend their whole lives trying to get life..but again, what is life? We have answers coming from everywhere, yet nothing definite. Sometimes I think, is this it? Is my fight for survival merely life.. cos then, whats the point? Just going to die anyways...
Plus, if you had life..how would you know? Cos, when someone is like, oh you need to get a life, or I want a life..... they are really saying, they wish they had something to do.... i.e they are bored at the moment...so therefore, would life be, the absence of boredom.... But surely, to experience life in all it's richness, you would need to experience the full spectrum of emotions, including boredom..
But, what I find contradictory, is, EVERYTHING is merely a motion. Even if you have 'life', whatever you do in it, is merely a motion, and the result of a motion, is an emotion..which again lead me to conclude, life is merely an emotion... a particular emotion that you want to feel... All it seems, is that life, or rather the motions you want to go through, are merely ones you enjoy.. For example.. take a typical Londoner... they get up at crappy o'clock hour, and go off to work... sit at some desk, doing menial tasks bored out of their tiny little brains, and then go home and have fuck all to do..Some people would say that isn't a life.. Why? Cos the motions they go through aren't satisfying..
When I was young, I heard all the fairytale stories about what we would do with our time on this planet. Grow up, get married, find your soulmate, settle down, and as the story goes... live happily ever after... But the plot is very differant in reality. But is that life?
I've recently been watching the Saw films. I find them really good, and I am most intrigued by the mind of John Cramer. He believes people need to be re-born to appreciate life.. He's asking them to appreciate the motions that they go through..but is that life? If it isn't, what is it? to him, if your only hearing then not really listening, then you aren't living, if your looking but not really seeing you aren't living. It's all just motions..but isn't that what life is physically? Going through motions? Because appreciation is an emotion, therefore life is merely an emotion.
People always seem to be reaching or striving for life, trying to get at it... as if to them, what they are experiencing now, isn't life. To me, trying to reach at something, is merely a dilusion if your reaching for life. If anything, it's trying to get reach an ideal, and idea about what would make them happy. If they have this, then this is life, and therefore it must result in happiness... So what if someone does reach what their ideal was? Do they have life then? If so, then life is merely about living out a fantasy. What if they aren't happy with their ideal once it's reached? By their own premise they are at life.. therefore they SHOULD be happy.. So do they live a lie? Claim they are happy, and realise that this isn't actually life? If so, what is life then? Confusing...
Some people spend their whole lives trying to get life..but again, what is life? We have answers coming from everywhere, yet nothing definite. Sometimes I think, is this it? Is my fight for survival merely life.. cos then, whats the point? Just going to die anyways...
Plus, if you had life..how would you know? Cos, when someone is like, oh you need to get a life, or I want a life..... they are really saying, they wish they had something to do.... i.e they are bored at the moment...so therefore, would life be, the absence of boredom.... But surely, to experience life in all it's richness, you would need to experience the full spectrum of emotions, including boredom..
But, what I find contradictory, is, EVERYTHING is merely a motion. Even if you have 'life', whatever you do in it, is merely a motion, and the result of a motion, is an emotion..which again lead me to conclude, life is merely an emotion... a particular emotion that you want to feel... All it seems, is that life, or rather the motions you want to go through, are merely ones you enjoy.. For example.. take a typical Londoner... they get up at crappy o'clock hour, and go off to work... sit at some desk, doing menial tasks bored out of their tiny little brains, and then go home and have fuck all to do..Some people would say that isn't a life.. Why? Cos the motions they go through aren't satisfying..
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